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AutonomatriXCorpus Fecundi Index
The following is a quick method I wrote up to someone regarding some internal alchemy. This seems to apply in the arena when the person can't help those feelings of, "Look at them, those stupid sheep". "They all look the same? No individuality at all." and basically the magician, let me wear black, be all goth and melodramatic and feel special based upon intellectual superiority. Note that I did not say the above traits were bad (I do not think I have to say these type of things but apparently sometimes it is necessary). This is to be used as one wills.
The preliminary to this requires the creation of a visualized model of ones own personality make up in the form of an alchemical laboratory with combinations of thee elements in such a way that the personality shell is represented accurately.
3) Get dressed in an outfit that is as trendy as you can find and think about how good it makes you feel to be dressed in the style that everyone so likes. Look at yourself in the mirror and think how "just like everyone else you so desire to be". Listen to a popular music radio station. Then go to the local mall, wear silver necklaces as well. While in the mall, notice similarities between yourself and everyone walking around (notice I did not say differences). Immediately silence ANY opposing thoughts which arise by the mantra, "I Am Not". Preferably by something, such as a trendy piece of clothing or a backstreet boys or britney spears cd. Do not eat anything. Return home as you will and begin to masturbate while listening to the backstreet boys CD (or a popular radio station if you did not buy the cd). Be wearing any items which you purchased.
Come to the point just before orgasm once, but do not ejaculate. Upon doing so imagine a star of chaos appearing in front of you. In front of this is the representation of the 4 elements which I described in the above virtual alchemical labratory. Start masturbating again. This time as you approach orgasm, imagine a flame of icy cold heat streaming from the chaos sphere and consuming you, your lab and everything around you. Scream in a physical and mental cry as you cum towards and for unity (preferably in the guise of your "higher self").
Place some of your cum/ masturbate in your mouth as soon as this is done. Goto the mirror. Look at yourself in the eye. Mouth, "I am NOT" with the cum in your mouth (note this shall be garbled). Say the phrase, "Nemesis, free me" and then swallow your cum staring blazingly at your eyes in the reflection. Say, "It is started. It is done."
AutonomatriX